Countdown

I'm sure there are many very bad things about dealing with cancer, practically none of which I have yet encountered. The only one I seem to be struggling with so far is... waiting.

Waiting in waiting rooms (well, that's what they are for, I guess.) Waiting in examination rooms (Mrs. Strays and I spent two hours in one - I was reduced to Hulu on the laptop.) And mostly waiting all day long, every day, for the next big step, which at this point is surgery. Thursday June 4, less than a week away. The only interesting thing in the meantime is that I go in around noon and will have had to fast since the midnight before. An opportunity to shed a few, but I will be powerful hongry.

One really does think about it most of the time. Wake up: oh yeah, I've got cancer. Get a headache: is it because I've got cancer? People who don't know ask: "How ya doin'?" "Great." (Thinking, kind of ironic.) People who do know, serious face: "So, how are you?" "Great, x days to surgery". (Thinking, amazing how great everyone is, but also does this person want to hear a longer version? Hope not.)

And you see references to cancer and terminal illness all over the place, and they certainly take on a new resonance. Is there a mini-economy, apart from medicine, based on all this?

So, the countdown. Five days to go.