Guy Noir Wrecks My Plans

The idea is to come up with 15- or 30-minute radio-of-the-air pieces that we can produce here with a local theater company, peddle them to Sirius or via the iStore, but we need scripts.  Which I've been trying to write in my head as I drive to and from work.

All I can think of is cases handled by a kind of uber-me, a lawyer/fixer who carries a gun,  does more than way more than contracts, takes on beautiful women and dangerous men, but how to I get around the cliches?  It all sounds like Guy Noir, Garrison Keillor's detective from St. Paul.

She walked in and at first all I saw was legs, down to 4-inch heels, down to toenails painted chocolate brown.  I'm thinking, "Not too early for dessert"  but all that came out was "May I help you?"

Stuff like that.

I need to get from funny to cool...